I Didn’t Use Twitter or Instagram for 3 Months, Here’s What (Didn’t) Happen

With the advent of social media it has never been easier to see the atrocities of the world, and not purely of war or greed, but of human nature as a whole. It is this instant access to these upsetting imageries that leads to anxiety and other ailments that plague our modern society. We can not only look and see what the world is up to, but also our friends and colleagues. In a para-social environment like social media, witnessing random people on the internet living extraordinary lives can send us spiraling into depression and have us questioning ourselves: “Why isn’t my life exciting like that?” Luckily these instances are a facade that veils the psychological tricks of social media, where dirty tactics are used to keep you addicted to checking the app, comparing yourself to others, and ultimately feeling negatively towards your “imperfect life.”

What you see on Instagram or Twitter is not the real world, but a cleverly manipulated snapshot in time created in the hopes to beguile people into believing what they are seeing is reality. The photo of war battered children is not from this morning but six months ago from an unrelated war; The photo of a seemingly jubilant person on a trip to the Bahamas is secretly and silently suffering from depression and uses trips as a way to cope with their afflictions; The conservative politician who preaches traditional values but cheats on their wife. These contradictions are as old as time, but they show that people may live a life that differs from what they let on. Social media is the perfect tool for this beguilement as it allows individuals to curate what others see about their life.

The Experiment

One day I decided that I wouldn’t use twitter or instagram for as long as I reasonably could. I realized it was a distraction that served no purpose but to waste my valuable and finite time and to line the pockets of big corporations by the consumption of ads and other psychically draining mediums. I deleted the apps from my phone and reassured myself that I wasn’t missing out on anything, which ironically is what most of us fear when not on social media. We believe that we are missing out on the world and our friends when not checking social media and thus need to reassure ourselves by giving into the feeling and loading the app. It’s a funny little paradox that is despairing to think about.

The First Day

They say the first day—- the first step, is the hardest. You either feel overconfident that you will succeed in your objective, or crippled by the challenges of something new. However the first day was rather easy. I worked my job, attended to side-projects, read books, and simply relaxed. My mentality at the time came from these questions I asked myself: “What was I missing out on by not using social media?” and “I have been using these programs for all these years and what do I have to show for it?” I am not someone who makes money off using the likes of Twitter and Instagram. I write articles like this one, work on websites, and produce music. Can these things benefit from promotion on social media? Sure, but I don’t need anyones permission to do them and can accomplish what I need to all on my own. Social media can be a useful tool, but this is a small portion of its use. Its true intention is to get you addicted to the product so that you consume it more and more. Not only are you bombarded with ads, but a slice of the beautiful lives of others and the remindement of how you don’t shape up. It goads you into wanting more of that bad feeling invoked by comparing yourself to the fake world that is social media.

Perhaps its western society, but when we see people with more than us our natural instinct is to ask ourselves “why?” and “how do we get that thing the other person has?” It keeps the cycle going and our spending habits coincide to hopefully one day reach the success we see in the world. These habits can get in the way of real life—- the thing you are living now. Comparing yourself to what you see on instagram is tantamount to sizing up your life to a character in a movie; if the characters in movies were as boring as the people in normal life, no one would watch films.

The Proceeding Weeks

After about a week, any intentions I had of checking social media waned. I felt like I was not interested in what it had to offer and I was no longer under its malicious spell. I lived my life as normal, but without the constant distraction and intrusive thoughts of “What am I missing out on?” I realized social media was not a party I was not attending, but an anxiety inducing carnival where the ruffians of the lot are going around nicking pockets and stabbing stomachs. It is not fun to use social media, but rather exhilarating in a toxic way as you see what’s going on out in the “real world” where everyone is happy but you. There are times where I feel a tinge of anxiety before opening the app. Just as a gambler loves the thrill of a win, we love the idea of looking at social media and finding something interesting or a message from someone we haven’t heard from in awhile. Every time we reload the feed we are spinning the wheel and hoping for a reward, but just as the house always wins, the corporation behind the app is banking off your psychology and ranking in the blood money from your addiction.

The truth is, everyone is living a life just as boring as yours. When someone is in the routine of traveling constantly and always looking for the next best thing, there may be an underlining feeling that they lack something in their life and are attempting fill it. Trips are great and going out on the town can be exciting, but these should only be small pieces of your life, not imperative parts. If you can’t be happy in this very moment, how would going somewhere else make you happy other than in that fleeting juncture? That is the danger of social media: it makes us believe that life is about being excited and showing off to the world how wonderful our roving lifestyle is.

We are all aware of the post-vacation blues where upon returning home we yearn again for the excitement we felt in that new place, away from the pressures of work, family, and other social obligations we feel necessary to attend to. Social media is that feeling but you haven’t even gone on that trip, but seeing other people experiencing what you want triggers that negative feeling. Some people live their entire lives believing consuming social media everyday is a sane way to live, but this mentality is flawed and dangerous. Our life’s duty is not to consume, but to create, and it’s hard to do the latter when you’re accustomed to only doing the former.

I found myself enjoying the small things more while on my social media detox. I felt more “in the moment” and used my phone less— the only way I would check social media. I went on more walks, had more time to be productive, and had better social interactions with the people in my life. This was life before social media. Normality. I felt no urgency or rush to “get things over with,” but rather enjoying every moment that came to me.

I am no longer an overly anxious person, but checking social media has always been a way to get my heart beating. As silly as it sounds, I feel like one day I will check instagram and see some either horrific or incredible thing. My time away from it all has made me realize that the likes of Twitter and Instagram are boring. They offer real no source of entertainment other than seeing how truly absurd its foundation is. These products offer nothing but a distraction from our reality, which is probably why they are so successful. I’m not a Tik-Tok user but I know of some people in my life who have spent the entire day in bed watching them. It is escapism at its most dire form.

After sometime had passed, I wanted to see my thought experiment to its end.

The Final Day

It was my day off from my day job but I still had work to do. I like to start the day off by reading and listening to music while sipping on some coffee. I try to limit the amount of conflicting information I take in while my brain is in its optimal state of retention. News and social media are some of the worst things to start the morning off with as the information overloads our brains with junk that serves no purpose to our life but to get an emotional reaction from us. Start the morning off with some light reading, a gentle workout, and a little caffeine, and you will see a change in your life, guaranteed.

The tangent above is the main reason I decided to abstain from social media for so long: it was not improving, but holding me back from being a productive person. When I was younger I over-used social media, and during the pandemic it became my own little source of panic and obsessive checking. I felt remote from those activities and feelings now. I have realized I don’t need social media at all, but rather it’s a nice little distraction once in awhile.

At about noon I realized it’s been approximately 3 months since my last view of Twitter and Instagram. I figured my little experiment had run its course and it was time to see what I missed. I downloaded the apps once again and logged in.

My brain was overloaded with information, pictures, and ads. I didn’t even really want to look at, it felt too overstimulating and unnatural. When we spend some time away from something we realize how it truly made us feel when we return to it, and I can’t say I thought I was missing out on anything at the moment. I persevered and checked what my friends had done or posted and their stories for the day. No knock on my friends and the people I follow, they’re a great lot and all live fulfilling lives, but I can’t say I missed much. No fun events worth posting about, no big life changes, or anything that caught me off guard. Social media is not real life, but rather a microcosm of what others want us to see, and I wasn’t seeing much. I didn’t miss out on much because nothing is actually “happening” on sites like Twitter and Instagram. “Life is constant change” is one of my favorite Marcus Aurelius quotes, but the constant change oscillates between the usual things. Someone traveling to Japan sounds like a fantastic trip, a trip worth posting about, but it has no real bearing on our life; we can also take a trip, it’s not necessarily an unachievable goal. Comparing yourself to others is not a good proxy value for how great your life is going. We all have feelings of inadequacy and doubts, why inflate them more with social media?

I received messages from people asking where I was or a meme they sent me, but there were no dire questions to be answered or emergencies in need of attending. The people that need to contact me have my number and can ask me for help or simply chat with me at any time. I’m a bad texter but I will always get around to it if it’s important. Which shows that communication is not social media’s main use, because if it was people would be using it to get through to me. Instead, the people that truly mattered to me had other, more efficient ways of contacting me.

Perhaps its my fault for thinking my experiment would yield any telling results, but it merely confirmed what I thought all along: social media is addictive and serves as a fun distraction, but offers no value. I haven’t made a cent by using Twitter and Instagram: why would I spend anything more than 5 minutes a day using them?

Your mileage may very and perhaps you make boat loads off selling a product on instagram. If that is the case, then using social media makes plenty of sense. For us that do not see Instagram as a lucrative endeavor, it’s time we reevaluate why we use it.

After the Flood

3 days had passed since I used social media for the first time in awhile. I had work to do at my job and books to finish so using a little game like Twitter wasn’t on my list of things to do before I die. I have decided to take another break from using social media as I am much happier when I’m not using said apps.

It’s easy to reassure yourself with ideas like “I don’t want to use social media, but I guess it doesn’t hurt to look at it right now.” Show yourself real restraint by abstaining from it for a couple of days and reassuring yourself of the things you’re NOT missing.

My Tips On How to Use Social Media Safely

Here’s what I’ve done to avoid the pitfalls of social media, something most of us feel like we have to use for some reason.

Don’t wake up and immediately check your feed

The beginning of your day should be calm. You’re getting ready for work or enjoying your day off— why would you want to introduce more unnecessary information into your day? Instead set a time or even a day where you’re allowed to check the news or social media. Preferably after lunch time. In the morning your brain is in an optimal state for taking in information so it’s imperative that you do not feed it with junk and unnecessary information. People have told me they have seen something on social media that made them so mad that it ruined their day. Why let something mess up your day when there is no reward?

Decide on a period where you don’t use it at all

Dopamine detoxes are all the rage these days with self-help gurus and pseudo-scientists, but there is some truth to the phenomenon. Your brain is not designed to constantly feel good and to be stimulated. Have you noticed that when you’re in love with someone the first few months are ecstasy until the feelings seem to wear off? Attraction, just like feeling good, are not sustainable and must be in juxtaposition to indifference and boredom. It’s good to be bored, it makes you realize that there are things you want to achieve in life, which you can’t do if you are in the habit of only doing “fun” things. Instead of getting bored and using social media to dulcify the feelings, give into it and do something like read a book, write, or go for a walk; embrace the boredom.

Realize That Social Media is a Snapshot in Time

We let people see what we want them to see and hide our true feelings when perhaps we shouldn’t, and social media is a magnification of this. Some seem to overshare on social media while other share nothing. Just as you may only post when something good or life changing happens, so do other people. Most people do not post about how they just got off work or cleaned the dishes; we want people to think we are living the optimal life, full of adventure and plunder.

The Final Goodbye

I am weirdly proud of myself that I was able to last 3 months of not using social media. It sounds silly, but in comparison to people who use it every day and maybe even every hour, the time spent away from it all was a fantastic break. I will continue to occasionally use social media, but no where close to the capacity I was accustomed to. Most likely I will post to my instagram account once this article is published but I don’t think I will check my feed. If I want to know what someone is up to, I will shoot them a text. My life is enjoyable as it is, I don’t need external things or other people to continue down this road of enjoying life.

I think back to all of those hours I wasted on social media and I can’t help but feel like I squandered time on something that proved no reward. At least with video games and movies you are experiencing a piece of art that is on some level mentally stimulating; Twitter is not art but rather a soulless product that has objectively made the world a worse place to live.

Now that my little experiment is over and this article is at its end, it’s time I get back to the “boring” life, of which I wouldn’t have any other way.