Why You Keep Getting Ghosted

This scenario has played out for you and everyone else in the world: You finally find someone worth their weight in gold. They could be best friend material, a soulmate, or just a straight up pleasant person to interact with.

Things are going great, but then seemingly out of nowhere, contact ceases. No more good morning texts, no more I love you's-- radio silence.

It's annoying as hell, so why does it happen? What causes someone to ghost us? Well, it's a lot of things, but it's mostly down to human nature.

Relationships are transactional

The reason people are in your life is because they get something from you. This can be sex, validation, money, or companionship. When someone ghosts you, it's because they feel like they aren't getting one of these things from you.

Not only that, but they perceive their value as being higher than yours. You're the one that needs them, not the other way around. A girl may ghost you because she sees that her value is way up there in the clouds and yours is in the gutter. A high status or value person typically doesn't want to be associated with one of low value.

This can happen when a girl senses the desperation in a man. A high value man would never act in or display emotions of despereation. Act like you can do better, and other people can sense it. If you don't give a fuck, then it's a sign that you have options, but when people sense desperation, they feel like you don't think you are worth what you are going for.

How to Deal With It

I've been ghosted plenty of times. Does it hurt? It used to, but now I realize when someone ghosts you, it says more about that individual than you.

When someone ghosts you, realize that maybe they saw something you didn't. Maybe the relationship was doomed to fail and your rose tinted glasses kept you from seeing the truth. Also, when someone ghosts you without a reason why: who the hell wants to be with a person like that? No communication is a type of communication and they are communicating to you that they don't think you're worth an explanation.

It hurts, but it's easy to move on once you realize there's plenty of people to see! People who actually want to talk to you. If you see differently, it may be a sign your self-esteem is low and needs improvement, which is normal in a society like the modern west.

Every time I was ghosted or broken up with by a girl, I always found a better one, sometimes in the next week. And it's not just because I'm special, there's millions of people out there to try new things with. All you have to do is try and know you're worth it.

What to do when someone ghosts you

The nice thing is when someone ghosts you, they did all the work for you. You don't have to do anything else.

They stopped communication, and so do you. No checkup texts necessary. Don't worry, this person didn't die in a car crash, they're merely telling you "I have higher value than you". Mirror the emotions and actions of them and things will work out naturally. You don't have to respond when they finally do reach out, but if you do, there's no point in showing bitterness.

It's funny, when a person realizes they can lose you and that you don't need them to exist, they start acting differently, in ways that don't jeopardize losing you. If they don't, then they weren't worth it anyways.

I've learned not to respond to ghosts, but it's okay to do so. Maybe they will come around, but usually not.

I don't believe in ghosts so when someone becomes one, they cease to exist as well.